Each night, before I fall asleep, I try and ask myself how I did that day. Not just how I succeeded or failed or ate or exercised, but how was I as a person?
Was I good?
Was I bad?
Was I a mix of both?
Was there anything I wished I could change?
Was there anything I wished I could do over and over again?
I've been setting little personal goals for myself weekly, trying to either remove or enhance certain things I see in my personality or behavior. I usually come up with these things at night when I am reviewing my day.
For example, one of my major faults (and this is only a fault because it sometimes makes me feel a bit icky afterwards) is that I frequently reveal too much about myself. Shocker, right?!
I do this at dinner parties, or if I've met someone new I really like. In the moment I may just be trying to explain who I am or where I have been or what I have been through, but afterwards I feel a bit hollow, icky and exposed. So, I have decided to eliminate that from my behavior, let only those who love me or wish to know me really well know who I am. For the rest, I have plenty of silly stories to share. But my secrets, I'll guard.
But other than these little things that one can analyze and no one else may even pick up on, the average person on a daily basis is not met with huge chances to prove they are a good person. Despite what we see in the movies, there aren't enough buses careening through town for us to jump in front of in order to shove old ladies out of the way. Big opportunities that may define us for a long time as being "good" are rare...
So, what's a good person to do? Well, just like anything in life, you've got to practice.
Fortunately, life gives us hundreds of little opportunities every single day to be "good."
When I wake up in the morning to go walk Dungee my neighbor lady's paper is always at the bottom of our driveway. Now, I can choose one of two things: walk over it and leave it where it lay OR I can pick it up and place it in the nook of her doorway. Not rocket science. Just a nice thing to do.
At a stop sign, I can acknowledge the fact that I got to the sign first and proceed to speed through OR I can wave to the mom and son standing and yell out my window "Go on ahead! I'm in no rush!"
Out surfing. I can drop in on someone if we're both going for a wave, or I can let them have one if it is their turn.
I can walk over a piece of trash, or I can pick it up.
I can eat the last pumpkin spice muffin or I can leave one for my roommate.
You get the idea. Tiny. Little. Mini. Chances. To. Do. Good.
And each day, as you do it once, you do it again and then it becomes habit. You suddenly are the only person at Trader Joe's that smiles and waits at the sample counter. People in the line-up thank you for not dropping in. Your neighbor lady becomes your friend. You have more pleasant drives everywhere...
And over time, before you fall asleep you know the answer to the question.
I was a good person today. And you sleep soundly and happily, wondering what opportunities the next day will bring to be good.
I've been doing this for about two months now, and it was all inspired by what is now a mildly famous story, The Story of The Good Wolf.
"There is a story about a Navajo grandfather who once told his grandson,
'Two wolves live inside me. One is the bad wolf, full of greed and laziness, full of anger and jealousy and regret. The other is the good wolf, full of joy and compassion and willingness and a great love for the world. All the time, these wolves are fighting inside me.'
'But grandfather,' the boy said. 'Which wolf will win?'
The grandfather answered, 'The one you feed the most.'
So, this Thanksgiving, invite the Good Wolf to your table and feed him well and continue to do so every day you can.

